Steven's New Dorm...a really long post.

Today was our big day. We drove about three hours down to Abilene, had some Dairy Queen, then headed to Steven's new dorm. We started out the day wtih a meeting involving everyone who will provide services for Steven. There were about 20 people there and they asked us tons of questions.

Next, we headed over to the infirmary for his physical. The doctor was very kind and patient and Steven did relatively well for the physical.

After that, we headed to his "cottage" to see his room, meet more staff and meet the roommates. There are a total of 10 "young men" living there. They range in age from 9-16. Some kids have individual rooms and others share a room up to 4 people. The photos below are of the various rooms in his house.

This is the house kitchen. They prepare snacks and practice life skills, but all their meals are brought in from the main kitchen.

This is the eating area. There are 4 tables and usually they have tablecloths on them. When I took these pictures, they had cleaned up after dinner so tables were cleared.

This is one section of the family room. The room is divided into areas with a TV zone, a conversation zone, and a computer zone.

This is the other part of the room. The windows look out to the playground.

Sorry I forgot to rotate this one....turn your computer sideways.....this is the view from the family room looking down the hall. Steven's room is the second one on the right. Each two rooms share a bathroom. This is the bathroom that Steven shares with his suitemate.

If you walk out the front door, this is the view to the right.

This fort and swingsets are right outside their front door.

On the back of the house, there is a courtyard where they have BBQ and relax when the weather is nice.

After we got Steven unpacked, we headed to our hotel, had dinner and do some shopping for additional items he needs. We bought a rug so he can roll up in it each night, hangers and a few odds and ends.

When we got back to the dorm, Steven was gone. He was with his two aides....Daniel and Joey. Steven will have 2 adults in arms reach until Monday. After that, they will scaffold him to have one adult. Oh, and he has his own room so far!

We waited around a little bit and they came back to the dorm. This was our boy's face.

Steven is happy! They had gone for a walk to the sensory gym, stopped and looked at trees and enjoyed the freedom of walking around a safe environment.

Tomorrow is the day

We are hastily preparing for Steven's admission to the new place tomorrow. We will leave Dallas about 9am and head to Abilene in time for a meeting at 1pm. We will have several meetings down there on Wednesday, meeting with a doctor, then Steven will get to go to his new home. We will get to go with him to meet his roommates etc. Steven will stay at his dorm Wednesday night and the rest of us will stay in a hotel.

We appreciate all the kind words and calls. We'll try to update the blog tomorrow with pictures of his new place and details that we learn.

Love,
Bets

It pays to have an attorney in the family.....

Today, we woke up feeling back at square one. I didn't know how lucky I was to have my sister working behind the scenes! Huge kudos to Ang!

Short version is that she contacted the Attorney General in Texas and asked for guidance. They referred us to an advocacy attorney. While waiting for a call back from them, Ang suggested that I tell the county and state people that we had consulted an attorney.

About 11:00am, I left a message for the state guy who has never returned any of my calls. I also made a call to the county lady and mentioned the attorney. She stumbled all over herself and said she would make some calls.

I'm not sure who exactly made the right calls, but 20 minutes later, the state guy called me back. He began the conversation by apologizing for the delay in providing the services, thanked us for our patience and said he "had received a directive" that Steven was to be accepted at a residential school closer to our home.

The next few hours involved me answering the phone a lot. All of the people who wouldn't return my calls, couldn't answer questions and didn't show any interest, called me back. We have more answers now and feel more comfortable with the way things are progressing.

Steven's admission date is next Wednesday, 3/31. We will be heading to Abilene, Texas (about 3 hours away). We'll stay there a few days to help with the transition, then come home and try to adjust here.

Phew. And, thanks again, Ang.

Bets

Back to Square One....

I finally talked to the superintendent at the Brenham site this afternoon about 4pm. As of last night, he was the hold up. Turns out, he still was today and he was glad I called him.

He had reviewed Steven's file yesterday, but had some questions. He is concerned they do not have the appropriate behavior management staff and programs in place for Steven. And, when I told him how big Steven is, he was hesitant to place him in a group home with kids as young as 9 years old.

So, we talked about stuff and they have denied Steven admission. He may be able to accept Steven on an emergency basis, while we research other options. However, he is hesitant to do that because once Steven is there, they can't kick him out.....only the parents can make the decision to remove the child.

He was going to talk to the DADS guy and call me back. He ACTUALLY called me back just like he said he would. He didn't have any news because he hadn't heard back from the DADS guy, but he wanted me to know that he was working on it and keep his word to call me back.

He said either he or the DADS guy will call us back tomorrow.

Guess we're back to square one.......

Betsy

Squeaky Wheels

I have become the squeaky wheel. I'm pretty sure the Mental Health Authority (MHMR), the state school, the Dept of Disability Services (DADS) and Steven's new dorm (Brenham) recognize my phone number on caller ID before they even answer.

The sad thing is that no one answers my calls or even returns my messages.

As of last night, MRMR told me they were bringing the missing paperwork to my school today to be signed. I started calling them about 11am. No one showed up.

Today, I decided I would just blast everyone's phones every 30 minutes until someone gave me an answer. I left messages throughout the day and never heard back. At 3pm, I called them and left a message that I would be at THEIR offices at 4:30 to sign whatever was needed. Earlier in the day, I had left messages for the DADS office, our MHMR case manager, the admissions coordinator at Brenham and made a new friend at Brenham's admissions office by the name of Shannon.

At 4:48, I heard back from the admissions coordinator at Brenham. She is awaiting the "official approval" from the superintendent. Steven's paperwork has been sent to his "house staff" for them to determine how much time they need to prepare for him. Once they know that, they will call us to schedule the "intake meeting". AFTER that meeting, they schedule the admission date. But, she said she completely understood how we were feeling.

I said, "Really? How old is your child?"

She said, "Oh, um, well, I don't have a child with autism."

"Then, I guess you don't completely understand how we are feeling." I replied.

She stumbled all over herself apologizing. I didn't say anything. She then continued that since this is an emergency admission, they would probably do the intake and admission on the same day. She promised to call me back shortly after 5pm. It is now 5:30 and I haven't heard from her. Shocking, huh?

So, that's the update for today. Essentially, virtually nothing has been accomplished in the past 24 hours. But, now I know that I need to contact the superintendent starting tomorrow morning about 7am.....every 30 minutes:)

I'm so glad I have a purpose for tomorrow.

Betsy

Wheels move slowly....

When I didn't hear an admission date from anyone from the county, state or the school, I made several phone calls. I finally got ahold of someone at the school admissions area. She didn't know anything about Steven, but called her boss (who was travelling) and called me back.

Short version: They are missing paperwork (the same paperwork we provided last Wednesday). His admission date won't be this week. I asked for that boss to call me back tomorrow when she is in the office.

I called our case manager after this. He went home sick. I escalated to his boss, who finally got back to me at 4:55. She explained that they had us sign the wrong form. So, tomorrow they are coming to my school to have me sign it again.

Steven had a rough day at school. He made himself throw up on the bus on the way to school, got aggressive with staff on the bus and at school, and has been edgy since coming home this afternoon.

Frustrating.

Betsy

All heck broke loose

Well, since posting those great pictures, things changed last Monday. Steven's behavior has escalated enough that he can no longer safely live at home. Several people have been hurt this week, and the ER doctors agree that he needs emergency placement in a facility or group home.

We expedited that process last week while on Spring Break. We will receive a call tomorrow telling us when Steven will be admitted to his new home/school environment. It should be sometime early this upcoming week.

There are so many emotions that go with this. We know we are making the right decision for Steven and for our family. We will keep you all up to date and post pictures of his new place, etc.

Betsy

Happy Anniversary!

Yesterday was our 18th wedding anniversary. Troy and I were lucky enough to get a date day. We went to Ikea, out for dinner and for a walk. All in all, it was a great day.

When we came home, we were told to go upstairs and close our eyes. Megan and Christina were very busy while we were gone. This is what they brought upstairs!

They made it completely from scratch! They even dyed the fondant pink to make the ribbon and the bow on top. Their hands are stained like a pink smurf!

Earlier in the day, Megan, Steven and Christina went to the neighborhood school to play on the playground. The weather is absolutely beautiful right now and it was a perfect day to play outside!

Steven really liked the slide!

But he wanted to climb back up the slide each time he came down.

Megan and Steven also some bonding time on the swing!

Seeing our kids interact like this was really a great gift!

Sweet times!

They had a great time.

And, so did we. It was a great day all around!

B

Another boring update

I realized tonight my life isn't that exciting. I'm totally good with that.

Our "exciting news" is that Open House went well. Troy had a little fender bender yesterday when he was rear ended by a lady not paying attention. Megan got 101% on her math test. Steven had a good time at school. This is the kind of excitement we don't mind.

Tonight I caught up on facebook with a few friends. I found out that the husband of one of my friends got laid off. Another friend is selling their house. A third friend is moving out of the Phoenix area. Big changes for them.

Nothing blogworthy to post.....maybe tomorrow it will be more exciting when I can post pictures of the movers moving furniture up and down the stairs while we graciously point where we want the furniture to be placed.

Betsy

Time flies by

Been a while since I posted just because we've been so busy. Here's a brief recap:

1. Megan is registered for high school. We went to the parent info night last week and are really impressed by the school and everything it offers. We were glad to see that our decision to live within this specific high school's boundaries was the right one for Megan.

Meg participated in "Viva" last weekend. This is the annual district celebration for students taking middle school Spanish. There were contests for writing stories, making pinatas, creating authentic foods, a Spanish spelling bee and music and dancing. Megan made a cool pinata shaped like a maraca. I was a parent volunteer and enjoyed meeting more of the kids from Megan's school and spending time with my girl.

2. Steven is doing better in school. I guess it's just part of the cycle. Two steps forward, one step back. We are in the two steps forward part. Of course, next week is Spring Break so that will probably be a little more difficult for him since the routine of school will be gone. Oh, and he got a haircut this week.

3. Troy is keeping busy with his job and transitioning to his new job. He will still be with EDS, but on a new account. The new account is literally new to EDS. Troy is part of the team that is setting up the account procedures and standards. He's excited to work with some people from his past teams and be working with equipment that isn't outdated.

4. Betsy is still teaching and going to school full time. I still love my kinder kiddos and really enjoy going to school every day. Tonight is Open House and it should be fun for everyone. For the first time in a few years, I'm not totally burnt out and beyond ready for Spring Break. Don't get me wrong, the break will be nice. But, I don't feel like it's essential to my sanity and that's a great feeling.

We are planning on rearranging rooms in the house this weekend. Troy's office has been in the loft upstairs and he needs more quiet than the bannister allows (especially with Spring Break coming up and us being home all day). Megan is feeling a little distanced by being the only family member upstairs. So, we are moving Megan and my office up to the loft, Troy into Megan's old room and Megan's bedroom into the downstairs office. It will be nice to have our girl closer at night!

So, that's life in a nutshell!

B